Happiness is a state of mind, a habit, that can be inculcated !
Happiness is a state of mind that infuses positive energy, enables us to look at situations with optimism, helps us accept our own shortcomings and those of others, generates enthusiasm for creating a greater and brighter Future!
It is impossible to be in positive state all the time, after all we do go through challenges, bear loss of objects or person, experience betrayal, injustice, etc. Emotions are ‘our Energy in Motion’, they direct our attention and prepare us to deal with different situations. To maintain, high Happiness Index it is important to take control of the situation and Gravitate to The Baseline Happy State.
Apart from ‘feel good factor’ Happiness is essential for wellbeing of a person, Productivity of Organizations and Prosperity of Countries! No wonder the topic has been extensively researched by scholars of diverse fields including – psychiatry, psychology, neurobiology, physics, management science, mathematics, quantum physics, economics, religion, mysticism, cosmology, spirituality, modern and ancient philosophy, etc.
Following are 10 habits that can contribute significantly towards creating of Long & Lasting Happiness!
1. Love thy self: Knowing and accepting oneself is essential for Happiness.
People are often caught between their actual self and ideal self. They constantly feel guilty and unaccepting of their inadequacies, causing perpetual unhappiness. Accepting oneself does not mean maintaining the status quo or living with our weaknesses. It is taking accountability, moving with responsibility, believing in oneself, and being able to move on the path of Self Improvement without being judgmental and critical of oneself. Negative feelings about oneself only depletes the energy, brings down self-confidence, and reduces the ability to take action.
People who fail to accept themselves fall into the habit of unnecessarily blaming oneself brashly for all that goes wrong. They suffer from low self-regard, and constantly judge themselves from the eyes of others. “What will they say, will she/he approve, etc”. Don’t let others dictate your worth and control your happiness!!!
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
It is important to remind ourselves that we have our own strengths and weaknesses. It is in our control to use them appropriately. Taking ownership of our actions, and being responsible gives us the power to change our situation. This power gives immense self-confidence, promotes positive feelings, enhances life satisfaction and engenders happiness.
2. Build Optimism: Every difficult situation is an opportunity to explore new possibilities. Circumstances don’t shape us; we evolve, grow and metamorphose into stronger individuals after facing challenging situations.
“Our doubts are traitors, and make us loose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt.” – William Shakespeare
Realistic assessment of the situation is imperative for developing an appropriate strategy to combat a situation. Though over optimism may lead to under assessment of danger and lead to inappropriate preparedness, while loss of optimism on the other hand may lead to helplessness and lack of initiative. Adopting a positive CAN DO approach enhances confidence during adverse conditions, helps in planning, recovering, and sustaining pervasive feelings of happiness.
3. Be Proactive, Not Reactive: Use your resources well to evaluate the situation, weigh the pros and cons, plan your strategy - before reaching a decision.
“Between a stimulus & response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”- Viktor Frankl
Once a decision is made, take the responsibility of the actions you take and the choices you make. ‘ Many people digress to a dissonant state immediately after making a choice, or if someone apprises them of a counter perspective. For example, after buying a house, they might just start thinking of how grave a mistake it is to buy under current market situation! Once a decision is made, a corrective action can be taken, but brooding over the decision can only be debilitating.
It is important to respond to decisions in a balanced way, while trying to reduce dissonance, maintain positivity and promote well being.
4. Stop Dwelling on Failure: Not every attempt of ours is successful! Failure should not lead to a chain reaction of thoughts, linking to past failures, leading to self-criticism, and demeaning one self.
Repetitive reflection and rumination steers in a host of adverse outcomes, including poor problem solving, negatively-biased thinking, impaired motivation and concentration, and increased stress and problems. Prolonged dwelling, especially when done in a negative mood, triggers unhappiness.
Beware, refrain from succumbing to failure, maintain your positive attitude with inner peace and happiness.
In words of Thomas A. Edison - “I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.”
Some people live in a constant fear of failure, that they will lose their wealth, health, position, job, spouse, etc. Have confidence in your abilities, focus on self-development, get rid ‘disempowering beliefs'!
5. Maintain Social Relationships: Our relationships with other people provide love, support, meaning, and increase our feelings of self-worth. Well-developed relationships give a feeling of security, they help shield from the negative effects of life’s daily demands. These relationships can enhance and sustain pervasive feelings of happiness. Invest time and energy in developing quality relationships.
6. Avoid Social comparison: It is important to focus on one’s own goals and achievements and maintain positivity despite inevitable fluctuations in one’s own performances relative to other people. Comparing material gains, successes, achievements, etc. with others leads to feelings of self-deprecating, unhappy states.
Multiply your happiness by being happy in others happiness and harness feeling of self-worth by helping others at the time of need.
7. Practice Forgiveness: Everyone experiences setbacks or bad experiences in some form or the other, for example deceit, heartbreak, carrier setback, personal loss, grief, etc. We can either stay in vengeance mode, keeping our wounds soar, waiting to take revenge, and wishing something bad to happen to the person responsible OR we can set ourselves free from constant heartburn, pain and suffering by detaching from the person completely, releasing ourselves from the bond of taking revenge.
Forgiveness gives the option to be free from the person or the event that caused distress in the past. It is the choice between past and future, being right or Happy!
8. Help others: Caring about others by contributing to their well being boosts our happiness as we add more meaning, value and larger sense of purpose to our own lives..
The more value we assign ourselves by helping others, the more it enhances our self-worth, making us feel highly satisfied and Happy.
9. Express Gratitude: When we realize how much people have done for us or how much we have accomplished, we feel more confident and efficacious. Many people have the habit of focusing on failures and disappointments or on other people’s slights and hurts. Gratefulness can help unlearn this habit.
The practice of gratitude encourages a person to value life and be thankful that things aren’t worse.
10. Dream & STRIVE: Happiness comes from a willingness to learn and grow on a journey aligned with your values. Feeling good about the future is very important for our happiness. Choosing meaningful, but realistic goals gives our lives direction and brings a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction when we achieve them.
Nothing is more intoxicating than success! Strive High for your Next High!
Happiness is a way of living life, a thought process, and an ability to enjoy what we have. If we structure our lives in a way that our happiness is dependent upon something we cannot control, we will experience pain. Knowing oneself, developing positive self regard, building optimism, creating good relationships, managing our emotions, etc. are key Emotional Intelligence skills that can enhance Happiness! (STRIVE HIGH holds courses on developing the Emotional Intelligence skills from time to time. To find out about upcoming workshops please email at firstname.lastname@example.org )
Research indicates that happier people do better in life, because positive emotions actively help people create desirable outcomes. Happiness is finding joy ‘with in’ rather than ‘seeking outside’. It gives us the strength and confidence to face forthcoming challenges. It is a practice, a habit and 'should not be momentous’ but 'should be continuous’.
I wish you, a HAPPY New Year!
Through our customised Workshops, Trainings and Coaching, we help clients enhance their social and emotional competencies necessary to achieve their Professional and Personal Goals.
Our training solutions and transformational workshops on Emotional Intelligence are designed to help our clients to :
Discover 'social & emotional strengths and weaknesses', and understand the impact of the same on personal and professional lives.
Develop innate capabilities into core strengths.
Learn to navigate through challenging situations with ease.
Enhance conflict management, stress management and communication skills.
Develop leadership skills - learn to inspire others by building emotional connection utilising the strongest energy that moves people instantly and builds sustainable synergies.
"Emotional Intelligence is more than twice as predictive of business performance than purely cognitive intelligence and is more predictive of business performance than are employee skill, knowledge and expertise" -Gerald Mount
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